Natural Born Mongols

Description: A documentary a la "Super Size Me" where one Mongolian man sees if he can live off of horse's blood for thirty days. Severe consequences ensue.

Plot: Set in present day Mongolia, Chinggis Rath is lead guitarist in Teppanyaki; a musical ensemble prevalent in Mongolia's underground jam band scene. His band wants nothing more than to become Mongolia's next "Nomin Talst" (Mongolia's leading rock/pop/new wave/techno band). However, Chinggis has not been able to keep up with the musical talents of his band mates, Anandyn Mason and Yumjaagiyn Emer. However, Chinggis is notified of a new contest sponsored by leading wool carpet corporation in Mongolia, Erdenet Carpet. Erdenet Carpet is willing to give $1 million tugriks to anyone who can successfully drink horse's blood for thirty days. Chinggis sees this as an opportunity not only to make money, but as the big break his band needs. Chinggis Rath begins drinking the crude blood of Mongolian horses. The venture is hard getting used to, however by Day 10, Chinggis is wailing on his guitar like a jingisukan on a traditional Mongolian barbecue grill. "What magical powers," Chinggis says of the blood. Teppanyaki begins to receive popularity amongst wide ranges of listeners in Mongolia. "We're finally getting the attention as Mongolia's top jam band that we deserve," Anandyn Mason says. "Thanks Chinggis. You're the best," Yumjaagiyn Emer tells him. However, by Day 24, Chinggis begins to feel the full effects of the horse blood. His playing becomes darker...his desire for horse blood is higher in demand...and it's not only horse blood that he yearns for. After thirty days of consuming the horse blood, Chinggis and Teppanyaki receive the $1 million tugriks. However, it is too late for Chinggis has gone completely insane and feeds on the blood of his band mates, Anandyn and Yumjaagiyn. Chinggis causes "disruption and resentment" throughout the entire Mongolian music scene. Film ends with Chinggis turning into a horse.

Scene: After having consumed the horse blood for 12 days, Chinggis and his band Teppanyaki hold their first band practice. Anandyn lays down a thick drumbeat; one that Anandyn learned from Jade Wah-oo's influential second album, "Khuushuur On Your Skillet." Yumjaagiyn provides a fuzz-induced bass groove. Chinggis enters spawning a new guitar literally made from the sneeze-proof glass of a buffet cover from the popular Mongolian barbecue food chain Genghis Grill in downtown Ulan Bator. "Woh!" Yumjaagiyn and Anandyn proclaim. Chinggis then begins to tear *expletive* up on his new axe as his band mates look on in awe. His guitar playing is so good that it causes mass blackouts throughout northeast Mongolia. Both band members praise Chinggis for his new-found ability, however they have no idea what he is soon to be capable of...

Cast:
Samuel L. Jackson as Chinggis Rath
John Malkovich as Anandyn Mason
Javier Bardem as Yumjaagiyn Emer
Viggo Mortensen as Angry Owner of Genghis Grill in Downtown Ulan Bator

-Voltaire, Guy Fawkes, Bruce Springsteen.